a very strict plane

This is my “ready to facilitate the exit row procedure” face. I’ve sat in a few exit rows in my time. They are not a substitute for front row seats. No, those seats are built for humans. Exit row seats are an airline’s way of charging more for a tiny bit more room and outsourcing a lot of responsibility. If your ticket says “EXIT ROW” on it, as many of you know very well, the airline staff stops you and your brave few exit row companions before you even get on the aircraft and asks if you will help in the event of an emergency. This is normal. Today was less so.

A flight attendant showed up seat side to deliver a second exit row speech and thoroughly explained how to open the door, find the instructions for doing so in two different places, and would not leave before receiving a VERBAL CONFIRMATION from each exit row member?!! This is a very strict plane.

I said “yes” because my millennial flight attendant is super intimidating I’m a good person and feel confident in my abilities to rip a hole in the side of the aircraft on a whim follow the instructions of my flight attendants and read the placard on the door after thoroughly studying the instructional pamphlet in the event that the plane is being eaten by Godzilla experiencing an emergency.

EDIT: My wife tells me that exit-row verbal confirmations are normal. I guess I’ve just flown with a lot of flight attendants who don’t care if I live or die are not very good at following FAA regulations. See if I ever help them in the event of an emergency. Godzilla can have them.

We are California-bound again. Should be sunny and 78 degrees Fahrenheit today. Another trip, another doctor appointment. I would be more optimistic if I didn’t have a long list of reasons to doubt the just barely scheduled processing care we are set to receive. What I know after the last several run-ins I’ve had with other doctors recently is that self-advocacy at a medical institution is imperative. And paying incredibly close attention to and double or triple checking your doctor’s work and that of their administrative staff is so critically important. That’s part of my job on these trips and in the several days and weeks leading up to them. I ask a lot of questions to make sure that my best girl is treated well; no funny business. Sometimes these California yokels need a little taste of Minnesota nice.

We are so ready for the next steps of this journey. We are ready to be pregnant and done with trips to L.A. for a while. You know, scratch that. We are ready to be done with trips to L.A. that involve doctor appointments for a while; I’m always up for a little Sunshine state warmth. This trip out is for another womb check to make sure the room is ready for a squishy baby. If all goes well, we’ll be back in a couple of short weeks to do a live transfer. That term sounded pretty science-fictional to me the first time I heard it, so let me explain. It isn’t sucking an embryo out of one uterus and putting it into an adjacent one with a turkey baster. It’s an egg retrieval and fertilization and subsequent implantation into the carrier’s uterus without any freezing in between, just like a Wendy’s cheeseburger. Allegedly. So it’s not so alien-esque as it sounds, but it still feels like something out of Star Wars. At least to this guy, anyway.

So, at the earliest, we could be 2 weeks and 5 days pregnant by this time next month (🤞🏽)! That would be nice for all parties involved. It’s been a longer road this time as compared to last time. And a harder one. But we have high hopes (literally; we are on an airplane 😂). Something will stick at some point. Here’s hoping it’s this cycle.

Stay tuned.

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